fighting will

I went out
I did not have fun
I drank
More than I should have

I watched you
I pretended not to notice
I laughed and smiled
At what I do not know

I tried to have fun
I just did not know how

Wont you just take my hand
Show me how
give me the excitement we used to share

I set my eyes on someone else
I watched him
I pretended to not have a light just so he would be closer
I gave up smoking but that did not matter,

He was gorgeous his smile was so alive
his hair was dark and his eyes were bright
his mannerisms where unique and his confidence high

But still over my shoulder to you I looked,
But still I saw you in the corridor with someone else
but still I saw you dance with someone you don't care for

Why could I not, my feet were frozen to the ground
I pretended not to notice, not to care, I brushed you aside when you tried to talk

I told you I did not want your card
yet I did

I pretended to not care your birthday is almost here
I pretend that I would not want to be with you

Just take my hand and make it right

Just become the person you were meant to be
not this bullshitter you pretend to be ...

Tofay

Today I sit here in my shop selling the last of the few cigarettes on my shelf
I am closing the doors
ending a chapter

I move on in a few weeks time
I become another statistic
but its ok

I never liked it anyway
I hated the monotony
its like a leech sucking away all your time

But soon , soon it will be over and I can move on ...

All that I can say is
All that I can pretend to be is
All that I want to believe in is

But somehow I am down here, still waiting
trying to believe it will be, or is my mind just playing tricks on me

I wait,
I wonder,
I try,
I wish,
and all I still hope for is

Someone just pick up my pieces,
don't stick them back together just yet.

Tell me I am fine
Tell me its ok
Tell me to pick myself up from the ground

But from the ground I can not fall
I am waiting, wondering, anticipating
leave me here please let me wait.

Evidently it pays

I cant give up, not yet, not today
I cant get it out my mind, here it stays
I cant stop secretly, hoping

Please tell me its lost, tell me over and I have been used, tell me please just say it.

Its you...

Anna Nalick

"Wreck Of The Day"

Driving away from the wreck of the day
And the light's always red in the rear-view
Desperately close to a coffin of hope
I'd cheat destiny just to be near you
If this is giving up, then I'm giving up
If this is giving up, then I'm giving up, giving up
On love, On love

Driving away from the wreck of the day
And I'm thinking 'bout calling on Jesus
'Cause love doesn't hurt so I know I'm not falling in love
I'm just falling to pieces

And if this is giving up then I'm giving up
If this is giving up then I'm giving up, giving up
On love, On love

And maybe I'm not up for being a victim of love
When all my resistance will never be distance enough

Driving away from the wreck of the day
And it's finally quiet in my head
Driving alone, finally on my way home to the comfort of my bed
And if this is giving up, then I'm giving up
If this is giving up, then I'm giving up, giving up
On love, On love

what a woman needs !!

Due to a good friend of mine tagging me saying that she would like to see what a ' wannabe Mather Stewart would keep in her hand bag' I am doing this post on what I think are the essentials for a womans hand bag, (well its what I have in my bag but unfortunately I lost the cable for my cell camera and my big sister borrowing my other camera so will add pic's later)

1) Keys
a) House Keys
b) Shop Keys
c) Car Keys

2) McNab's Energy Tabs for tiredness stress and anxiety

3) Wallet filled with cards ID and Drivers actual cash is limited to the little packet of coins kept for car guards

4) Tampons (all girls need them)

5) Lip ice

6) Lipstick 2 shades a dark and a light for emergency touch ups

7) Body Cream - Marula collection the little one they give you in hotel rooms when you check in I save them for my hand bag due to size convenience

8) Peppermints from coffee shops you never know when they will come in handy

9) Eye liner black

10) flash stick

11) little bottle of promotional perfume (clinique free gift happy) again convenient little size

12) eye cream for puffy eyes

13) Ciggaretts

14) Lighter

15) Cellphone

16) pocket pack of tissues

17) various business cards

18) till slips from pick n pay woolies clicks and foshini

thats it guys thats what I have in my bag !

WHY KARMA WHY

I have been sent away on business flew out today and fly home tomorrow,

Being a firm believer of Karma I dont understand what I have done to deserve being subjected to SCREAMING BABIES

I being a very fragile flyer' do not enjoy moving during a flight I sit in my seat and close my eyes and pretend I am sleeping but that was not to happen on this flight as I was seated next to a mother with her 2 screaming toddlers.
They screamed threw toys had snotty noses and generally shoved bumped and shilled every 2 seconds, they insisted on looking for toys thrown at other passengers under the small aircraft seat, now being seated on the isl I got pushed and shoved and asked to move every few minutes! what was the mother doing you may ask? giving in to their every whim and appologising and saying they normally quiet well behaved! BULLSHIT those kids had never heard the word NO! sit down and shut up!!!

Now after this stressful plane experience which made me realize I dont want kids any time soon, I check in to this peaceful B&B
start to relax and unwind which was the point of coming a day before my big meeting and as I settle down for a relaxed afternoon nap I hear a Baby screaming and I think no no no please why now!!! The screaming has not stopped since 2 this afternoon all I wanted was a few days to relax enjoy my day off and relax before my big meeting!

So obviously I have done something serious to Karma as she is punishing me severely!!

ALL I WANT IS SOME QUIET IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK?

Distractions out the window

OK well so much for the distraction!!!

It was short lived and pointless so back to my original scenario, something has got to distract me from this soon or I will go crazy !!!

Well I fly off to Cape Town on Monday Big meeting (I am Jet setter... lol)

Short Hi and Good Bye not much happening

I have a few new eye candy's yummmmmmm